what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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