and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize