Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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