Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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