I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
