I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
