I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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