What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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