R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
