OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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