We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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