Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
