I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize