What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
