I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
