I love black thongs
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
