Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
handjob tips. give me some.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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