shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
