Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
im six kinds of drunk right now
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
