Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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