k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
