So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Randomize