is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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