I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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