My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
How external is "for external use only"?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
