don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
