I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize