Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I take back everything I said about communal showers
There r osticjed everywhere
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
