No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
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