I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
