I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
