first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
