I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize