Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
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