shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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