There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
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