She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
