Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
