did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
