Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Randomize
