Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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