he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
