Kiss
Puke
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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