He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
She just used a chaser for red wine.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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