i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
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I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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