I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
