just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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