I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
