question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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