my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
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MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
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Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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