hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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