Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
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